“Let’s face it, with hot glue and a chainsaw you can solve most problems.”
[The party is visiting the elderly Schoenberg in Los Angeles] “My wife and children are used to my music. I am not sure my sons understand it, but it no longer frightens them.”
“I can’t think of a use for two loofahs that I couldn’t accomplish with just one.”
“Oh, sod it. Just splay 'em wide open.”
“Meanwhile the Atlanteans have just destroyed Camelot with onagers.”
(Imperium.)
"Did you make a salami monocle? A salamocle?
‘Like a carbonated goose’
“I knew the White Moose had to be a druid!”
“It spoke druidic, but us druids cannot speak when we change into a beast”
'What if you morf into a chatty moose?"
“I was initiated into the order of the Cosmic Platypus”.
(A genuine thing that happened to my partner, at Phantom Peak)
A Moose once bit my sister…
I hope it wasn’t a chatty moose
We apologise for the fault in this joke. Those responsible have been
sacked.
The first time I saw that film it was on someone’s dodgy copy… with subtitles in Danish. (We were not in or near Denmark.)
The fake Swedish at the start was subtitled at length.
Also apparently the Danish for “oral sex” is “oralsex”.
That’s really what I want to read about.
What are uncrustables? Do I dare ask?
Premade peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, with “the crust removed”, but not really because they are just manufactured in a way that never involves crusts, I’m pretty sure.
I think it’s also an important facet of their character that they are also more or less sealed at the edges, which means that you can more easily eat them without getting the filling all over your hand.
I find them fairly disgusting myself, but that’s mostly because I don’t like soft, texture-less bread. But even though I’m very skeptical of the newsworthiness of the story, it makes sense to me: it’s an individually-packaged, portable, insipid, and easy-to-eat food.
What I find intriguing is the last part of the headline “… by far the most in the NFL.” It implies that uncrustable consumption has been investigated across all the NFL franchises, and ranked. So not just a causal story, but one that required research effort.
“When he swallows, there’s a deep look of regret on his face”
Paywalled unfortunately
But yes, they surveyed all the teams
they’re also frozen, you thaw them to eat.
uncrustables are pretty popular among athletes as a during or post workout/practice food. They have the convenience stuff, but it’s also a reasonable mix of macro nutrients (fat, protein, carbs) for it. Enough carbs to be useful as reasonably quick source of energy, plus some fat and protein to make it a little more satiating and slower to digest than mainlining sugar.
I’m not a big fan of factory processed foods in general, but I find these much worse than many such things.
