Actual things you actually said (or heard) in the last 24 hours

(Game set in the 1950s; planning our covers for a mission to Egypt, which is experiencing an unexpected religious revival)

“Reporters?”
“Let’s not go as the Daily Mail.”
“I see the headline now, ‘Hurrah for the human sacrifices’.”

“Clearly this isn’t a real alternate history, we can’t go by airship.”

“If he’s ever had a bodyguard before, he is familiar with the feeling that comes over him now.”

8 Likes

“There was a moment when I was king of Romania”

8 Likes

“I sympathise - probably an age thing Mike – I was told the other day that I’m still operating on Dial Up whereas everyone else is fibre!”
“Dial up??? I’m still on the party line!”

9 Likes

„You are like walking clickbait, can you get to the point?“

8 Likes

“It’s like me trying to get up off the floor” - comment on breaking at the Olympic Games

6 Likes

Returning the Duke of Windsor to his wife:

“One Duke, largely undamaged, M’arm.”

“Any mission transporting a Royal Duke across a neutral country that you can walk away from is a good one.”

7 Likes

“It’s basically two-thirds engine, and a set of courtesy wings.” — talking about the Gee Bee Sportster.

“The first rule of international cuisine is that you can’t get good tea between the Channel and the River Bug.”

“We may get some thermals in Montserrat. Let’s not worry about that.”

6 Likes

“She’s completed golf!”

– The Olympic commentators getting a wee bit over-excited about Lydia Ko’s latest achievement.

3 Likes

“The menial vampires, for some reason, are jug-eared Frank Sidebottoms who sound like seagulls”

6 Likes

“It’s pretty here. “
“No, it’s all trees!”

4 Likes

“I really ought to get out of this chair and go to bed. But if I stay here maybe the cat will eat me and then I won’t have to.”

“We’ve had no internet for 30 mins and already the dog is in a tutu.”

8 Likes

That reminds me of my quote in the yearbook we had (for the American football team I played for at Uni) - “I really ought to go home. But I can’t be arsed…”

(I was injured and watching training - I was cold and wet but the campus was up a big hill and if I waited, someone might give me a lift back up the hill!)

6 Likes

“So, whatever you do, make sure you’ve got your strap on for this next bit.”

6 Likes

“Showaddywaddy… in a cowshed… on a Saturday night… Does life get any better?”

3 Likes

Everyone is a murderer before they are a serial killer.

6 Likes

Me: What do you want for dinner?

4yo: Santa Claus is making me a fountain. So that I can blow bubbles.

6 Likes

You’re going to have a really fun Christmas this year…

2 Likes

Apparently you need to murder three people to be a serial killer.

3 Likes

If those people are Snap, Crackle and Pop, you are a cereal killer

10 Likes

That brings a whole new meaning to, “Get Lucky.”

3 Likes