And arguably the only kind…
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Tech Support: Let me know when the router light changes colour.
Me: OK, it’s flashing orange… and now it’s solid orange.
Tech Support: Aha! It has revealed its true form at last!
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“Solid? Hmm. Where’s your nearest church?”
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“I can’t be arsed to fix this fence. See if I care if the chickens wander into the sea.”
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“There’s no chickens in the sea! What, are they afraid to tell us it’s a fish? Think we won’t understand?”
– Jerry Seinfeld
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Party is exploring a room in a dungeon…
GM: “You hear the door starting to close behind you.” *makes slow noise of scraping stone*
…
*scraping stone noises continue*
… the players look back and forth at one another …
*scraping stone noises continue*
…
*scraping ceases with a thud*
…
“I can’t believe none of you went for the door.”
“We just thought it would be better to stick together…”
“You might need some luck to get out of this.”
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“Perry Mortem, Forensic Pathologist.”
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“Because I have nothing for you, you may lick the cheese.”
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‘I like a thick vein, but I draw the line at furry.’
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‘This dashed Lord Palmerston is making it very difficult to walk.’
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“Jam it against your starfish!”
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Those last two were from my mother, talking to her dog about the empty tub of spready cheese. This photograph may help to contextualise:
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It was better without the context. I still don’t know what’s going on, but the banality of photographs has left a smudge on my mind’s eye.
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I’m actually very grateful for the photographs.
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Not exactly a quote, but I dreamed last night that I was explaining to Henry Cavill what was wrong with DC movies, and Man of Steel in particular.
Dream Henry Cavill was very gracious regarding the conversation.
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From what I’ve heard of Henry Cavill’s genuine personality, I suspect there’s a 50/50 chance it wasn’t a dream and he actually broke into your bedroom last night to have that conversation.
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7 yr old: can I have some more crisps?
Me: No, im making dinner?
7 yr old: can I have ONE more?
Me: fine, ONE more.
7 yr old, legging it: I meant one more handful! Ha ha ha!!
Little sod.
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Papa!
What?
If I touch the sun, I die!
Er, yes.
… Papa!
What?
… If I touch the sun a lot, I die a lot!
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I’m hearing that Henry Cavill’s personality type is “amiable sociopath”?
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