“Did I go somewhere, papa, in the outside world?”
“Where did I go?”
3 Likes
“I trod in a corpse. Oh. No, just the laundry.”
10 Likes
I can’t sleep in there, it smells like a brewery
4 Likes
Sat round the dinner table, our 13 year old said, “we’ve spent about 7 hours in PSE learning about pornography. I learnt a phrase I wish I never knew existed”
I’ve been making my wife cry by texting suggestions of what it might be
14 Likes
“I’m going to have a hot bath because I’ve just bought some bAth salts”
My partner, saying the first Bath like “part” and the second like “math”, because she’s northern but also an actress and her accent knows no limitations.
10 Likes
“I’m the Nelly Furtado of Carrom”
5 Likes
To be fair, I do that cos I grew up with a flat A but my wife’s family and where I live all use the long A. So I mix and match
4 Likes
Where did she go?
3 Likes
Lions are just glam rock tigers.
8 Likes
By that rule, cheetahs are poxy skinny tigers
4 Likes
“Bloody French, when you think they are going to be an embarrassment, they let you down”
5 Likes
6 Likes
“I think you can have a bonus die on this Intimidate roll for having set some of them on fire.”
18 Likes
man, that must have been a rough show.
2 Likes
It was wild??
3 Likes
“Who was it that kept forgetting the names of people?”
9 Likes
Ok.For the record if anyone liquefies Geoff and drinks him as Jello Shots I will be tapping out. The mind can only take so much.
11 Likes
This week in “conversations with my therapist”:
“I think I’ve just filled in my ADHD bingo card”
6 Likes
“Hey, I didn’t lick your Dreamies. That’s not a euphemism.”
9 Likes