Champion of the Wild - April 2021

A coach has asked a question regarding Stage 1:

What is the limitations on the equipment. Like can I fit a snow plow <on my animal>

Outside equipment can be brought in as necessary to assist, provided it is not powered in any way other than by the competing animal (i.e. no electric/engine-powered equipment)

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“Necessary Provisions” is the phrase used per the rules. However, also per the rules, the event host gets to set the criteria. If this is how we’re doing this one, my idea suddenly seems woefully insufficient. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: Animal change incoming.

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As said coach I feel that we are at risk of creating fantastical animal powered machines. My day job may be taking over at this point.

We may wish to limit it to pre existing apparatus which could be adapted or used by said animals

If you can sell it to the audience, more power to you :grin:

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I fear I am setting myself up for last place.

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I have entries from 4 5 of the coaches

All Coaches have selected their competitors!

Coaches, please introduce your competitors and describe in what way they they will be competing, how you’ve been coaching them and what last minute advice you are giving them before the event begins!

(If you want to wait for turn order, please proceed in the following sequence:

@VictorViper
@COMaestro
@Brattyjedi
@Najim
@GabrielH
@GeeBizzle
)

Ok We’ll go first.

I choose Bruce the shark for this event.

For months I have been training Bruce on using a full body harness which can be attached to a cart. In this way Bruce can comfortably pull 30% of his body weight (336kg) at a speed of 50km/h. Throughout this stage I will be loading Bruce’s cart with sand and by putting a small cut on my hand and bleeding into the water I can help direct him on where to swim.

Last words of advice to Bruce would have to be follow the blood.

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I will be entering this competition myself. As a father of two boys, I am used to bearing heavy weights and feel like I have been training for such an event for years. I am confident I can move 50kg of sand per trip, and with my long legs, I span a good amount of distance with each step, and always walk with a sense of urgency, which should eat up the distance between the sand pile and the goal.

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This is Steve. He’s a pack alpha and a very good boy, yes he is! He cut his teeth on Caribou hide and Iditarod races where he keeps getting disqualified for not being a dog. For this race, I will need to start by lining our lane with a dusting of sand. From there, we should have the low friction required to load up our sled and mush! to victory.

Wild card here is me. I can shovel sand with the best of em, but my back is sore today and I really gotta think about quitting smoking ahead of these things.

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This is Helena the Hippo. She’s got the strength to carry a lot of sand in any one trip but is surprisingly fast despite her mass to get in lots of trips in the time limit. There’s many reasons hippos are one of the most deadly land animals to humans, and one is that people always underestimate their land speed. No need to weigh her down with sleds or carts. Just a simple harness that will allow me to hang several sandbags along her sides and she’ll be off!

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Meet Nils the Narwhale, he is the grandson of Norman, whose tusk was used to stop an attack in London in 2019. So Nils already has heroism in his blood. I easily hang some sandbags around his tusk and his body. Since he is almost 6m long 20m of swimming is a piece of fish cake for him.
Right before the start I would whisper in his ear: “make your grandfather proud” And I have no doubt that he will.

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As a spectator of this amazing event, am I allowed to like post I find good, or should I only like the one I’m voting for?

Based on how we are doing the vote, you should only vote for a post if you think it should win. It’s possible for you to vote for multiple, but the more you vote for, the less effective each of your votes is at deciding the winner.

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@COMaestro I think it’s perfectly valid (and awesome) to attempt this one solo but I think it’s worth pointing out that coaches are involved in this event by default, in case you missed that.

You don’t know my animal competitors. Really, this is the best option.

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Steve just gave me one heck of a tactic. Instead of wasting all that time dusting our lane, I’m just going to set up enough to get the sled moving and dump out a bag as we push ahead. Steve gets a Prototype Performance Treat (PPT*) from our top labs.

*Victorinarian Labs (DBA Rabbit 'Roids™) and its partners are neither affiliated nor endorsed by the Champion of the Wild or the Event Selection Committee. Please real all labels carefully and remember: May the Best Fed Win!®

And our late entry, Audrey the Otter! If you were to transport sand in real life, how would you do it? That’s right, with a barge! And that’s exactly what we’ll be doing here! I can load it up, and then Audrey will pull it down the canal! We’ve been barging in everywhere we go in anticipation of this event, and I’ll just remind her that anyone can walk, but only the greatest can barge!

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Now that all the contestants have been announced, I’ll ask the coaches to ask any questions of each other that they may have.

To have some conversation, how about questions for @GeeBizzle

How are you keeping the sand in a cart for Bruce the Shark going underwater? Wouldn’t the sand drift away in the water? I’m not overly sure about any sand in water so I’m worried about @Najim and Nils the Narwhal as well, but sandbags hanging off the animal seem to me to have a better chance than sand in a cart.