“Some sort of lurid Humpty Dumpty”
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“Don’t injure yourself coming down the stairs; that’s all we ask. … well… that’s not all we ask. That’s one of the many things we ask.”
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“If you’ve got enough spunk to cover an entire clock then there’s something wrong with you”
“How do you decode spunk?”
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“Cosmic Horror is my comfort zone.”
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“This is a Waitrose pizza, is it? That explains the truffle.”
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I have to confess that I really do, but equally, the average punter isn’t opening industrial-sized tins as fast as possible inside a giant fridge for hours on end.
(in case anyone’s worried, thankfully, I am also no longer doing this)
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Assuming this was a job and not a hobby, it sounds the best job ever!
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Spot the person who has never been worked in food service…
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Sorry if my sarcasm wasn’t made clear!
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Easter Pig (quietly): “Oink”
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My poor daughters may never understand the beautiful moment that happened today.
Them: “Who is bath man?”
Me (in a suitably gravely voice): “I’m bathman.”
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“Dingbat’s a bit kind. You were being a right pony.”
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