“It’s like a shard of darkness.”
“Better than a shart of darkness.”
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In Battletech, there are 3 general sizes of Laser weapons: Small Lasers, Medium Lasers, and Large Lasers. These are usually abbreviated SL, ML, and LL.
In Germany, these were translated as Leicht Laser, Medium Laser, and Schwer Laser, and helpfully abbreviated SL, ML, and LL (they changed the names, but not the abbreviations).
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I was told an amazing joke by my three-year-old:
Her: “Knock knock”
Me: “Who’s there?”
Her: “Piggie!”
Me: “Piggie who?”
Her: “…oink oink!”
Separate conversation:
“Put that on the family crest: 'I can do it! I can do any- oops.”
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Send that back with “interrupting sheep”
When she starts saying, “interrupting sheep who?” you just bellow “baaaa” when she’s halfway through.
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Over here it’s “interrupting cow.” It’s one of the Mrs’s favorites!
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“What’s the secret to good comed-TIMING!”
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A book I had as a child had this riff on Edgar Albert Guest:
There once was a thing they said couldn’t be done
But he with a laugh replied
He’d never be one to say it couldn’t be done
At least not 'til he’d tried
So he buckled right in with a hint of a grin
By golly he got right to it
He tackled the thing that couldn’t be done
And he couldn’t do it
(written from a combination of memory and looking at the more easily-found text of its predecessor, so I’ve probably made mistakes. For most of my life I didn’t know about the E.A.G. poem; I’d always thought the one I knew was just a funny original : )
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Ah, that brings back memories. The version I knew was, very roughly:
They said t’was a thing that couldn’t be done
And deep in his heart he knew it,
But he tackled that thing that couldn’t be done
And — he couldn’t do it.
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“What’s wrong?”
“I was singing”
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In my house, it goes more like this:
Me: “What’s wrong?”
Wife: “You were singing.”
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Tabletop Scotland organiser: How did your Doctor Who game go?
Doctor Who GM: It started when the party arrived in ancient Alexandria. It ended with the Great Library of Alexandria on fire. Anything in the middle was fine by me.
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1: No food in here!
2: It’s not food, it’s drugs.
1: Okay, then.
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According to AI the top five things the Doctor has burned are;
Skaro
Gallifrey
London
Vesuvius
The Master
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“…she got a couple of those human traps to put down in the house.”
“Humane, mum. They’re humane traps… I hope.”
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Not said, but texted:
I don’t play around with AI. I poke it every now and again and try not to get too much on me.
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‘I have made some sweeping assumptions regarding pants.’
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‘Bother, I have checked the etymology and “hierophant” and “elephant” are unrelated.’
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How about Heffalump?
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The research scientist who was sucked into a parallel universe whilst riding a photocopier
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Not heard, but read… the joys of autocorrect in an email from out telephony team:
“We have referred your issue to our spiciest team”
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