Is that so? Who is this mysterious Mrs. Everything, who’s the cause of all this trouble? 
Ooh, I bet she’s related to that nasty Mr. Nobody, who went and gave poor Mr. Polyphemus so much grief! 
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When is Nick going to apply some of his zoological knowledge as RPG tactics? Those hyena-style hunting strategies could be a great way of getting XP in D&D. Trudge around until you find a monster or trigger a random encounter, stab the critter, and run away. 
Then, you just wait for the septicemia to kick in.
Free experience! Virtually zero effort! What’s not to like? 
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If you armor the hirelings in ‘half-plate’, with each henchman being fully armored in front and wearing no armor on his back, surely you could just line them up back-to-back, so they’re fully armored? It’d be like a four-legged crab-walking tank.
One of them will have to learn to walk backwards, of course, but you could give him a shield and order him to polish it a lot, so he can use it as a rear-view mirror. Or you could do the crab-walking thing, and have them both practice walking sideways. 
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Session 3 - Both Of My Hit Points Tingling In Terror: A fight! And we start to get close to the actual dungeon…
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You’re right. Whartson Hall jokes are like caviar - just as easy to understand as if they were in Russian.
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Whartson Hall jokes are like caviar - best enjoyed in very small portions.
With an unexpectedly salty flavour of fish?
Worth paying their weight in gold for?
Best combined with heroic quantities of vodka?
Whartson Hall jokes are like imitated caviar - when you hear the joke flounder, you’ll wish that salmon would put a stop to it.
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Session 4 - I Will Disguise Myself As A Fun Guy: Into the Caves… of CHAOS.
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Session 5 - Detonate the Dunny: How to win a fight when we’re outmatched? Get sneaky.
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No toilets were harmed in the making of this episode.
I mean… that’s not really true, is it?
Well, no more than any goblins were.
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Nick, the difference between a real and an imaginary toilet can be experienced yourself quite simply…
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Session 6 - Unconscious Female Halfling: All we have to do now is live to spend our riches.
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Now, see, I saw the title and couldn’t decide if it reminded me more of a personal ad or some weird variant on the “Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer” sketches off of Saturday Night Live in the 90s.
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Session 7 - Seems Like an Odd Design Choice: Apparently we aren’t rich for life yet. So back into peril we go, now with more hit points.
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Good memory brought out here from my own gaming experience. We had a silly moment back in early 3rd edition when someone asked what Gnollish sounded like and the GM was impatient and snapped back “la francais!”. Ever since then all gnolls have spoken French in our fantasy settings. We even wound up having to deal with a Gnollish swashbuckler called the pink weasel.
I hope the solicitor enjoys their extra 0.25 billable hour to figure out what data retention requirements apply to the extra documentation received.
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Ohhh don’t remind me. Why do we never remember the happy times, but embarrassing moments are stored with crystal clarity?
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But it was a happy time for me, and I remember it…
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