I echo this sentiment - I’ve tried a few and finally found one that worked
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I’m currently in a “shall I, shan’t I” place with finding a therapist
It’s a brave step you’ve taken and I hope it’s the next step towards you being in a more positive place
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I too have done therapy, twice. The first few sessions are a waste of time, it’s all background and groundwork nothing is happening. Then session 3 or 4 you get to work. It might feel like nothing is happening. It’s only later, looking back, that you see how much changed. It’s really good for you.
And it is funny how no one puts a stigma on going to a doctor for a physical injury or ailment, but we continue to somehow look down on treating mental/emotional injuries and ailments. Take an objective look, there’s not much difference. If you can go to a doctor, you can go to a therapist. If you can need a doctor, you can need a therapist. It’s just part of being human.
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They can feel that way, yes 
But since the groundwork is necessary, I wouldn’t say they are an actual waste…
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Oh, absolutely. Describing the felt experience, as that is what anyone starting the first time will experience 
Agreeing.
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As with others here, the first wasn’t the best fit for me, but I found someone who suited me and it helped a great deal.
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A successful therapy relationship will involve the therapist understanding how you interact with the therapy relationship
I’m a pretty cerebral person and the best thing my therapist did early was recommend I read Irvin Yalom’s Love’s Executioner which is a memoir of an existential therapist and was a way of showing me he understood how I needed to frame my own thoughts on therapy
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My ultra-rare ebay find has arrived!
I’ve been wanting to own this for… about 30 years, since I saw it in a comics shop in Exeter. Original poster from 1996, art by the amazing Chris Bachalo.
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I’ve been seeing a therapist for about 18 months now. For the first 6 months it was about getting me through the week. It’s now one of my favourite things to do each week as it’s someone with whom I can discuss the person I want to be.
I hope it brings you strength and support. It’s a brave step to take, and I’m proud of you that you’ve taken it.
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Oh - and I am very lucky in that I clicked with my therapist first go. But she was the one who said “I may not be the right fit for you, and if I’m not, I want you to find the one who is” which was immensely comforting at the time.
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Surely this board game exists already, somewhere.
Presumably it has an engine where you can “generate” surgical opportunities for yourself through acts of evil. “I tap my Stealth to sneak into this house and tamper with the computer chair, raising the resident’s chance of back complications to 35%.”
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I am slowly gearing up to go back to work.
Two weeks ago I finally had the minor surgery I’d been waiting a year for, with lots of confusion along the way (including the doctor thinking he could do it in-clinic and then deciding against it on the day, and going to what I thought was the actual surgery at the city hospital and finding out no, it was yet another inspection indistinguishable from the others).
It happened in a rush as they had a cancellation. Then they signed me off for two weeks, when I’d been told I could go straight back to work. I’ve had various clinic visits for complications so it’s been a tiring fortnight. Stitches came out on Wednesday but I’m still on antibiotics and needing more follow-ups, uploading photos for the doctor, etc.
Exams have just started, so on the plus side I don’t need to prep as much lesson material as usual. It’s still intimidating, though. And I’ve picked up a horrible cold during one of those clinic visits, which doesn’t help.
Still, having the operation finally done is a huge relief. I look forward to getting back to the gym one of these days.
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It’s been one heck of a week the past number of days. Started Thursday night when I was showering, I noticed the water was just not getting very warm. Next day, no hot water. I check our hot water heater and the pilot light is out. Get it started up after a couple of tries, okay, great, we’ll have hot water in an hour or two. Check it a bit later and the light is out again. Get it lit yet again and watch it, and it goes out in under a minute.
Crap.
Call a couple of plumbers for estimates, but nothing until Monday. So it’s sponge baths or cold showers. I choose the sponge bath, heating pots of water on the stove. Much more comfortable.
Saturday my kid clogs both the toilet and the sink in the shared bathroom. The sink slowly drains, but it’s not right, and the toilet is all messed up. A bunch of plunging finally gets it to a point it also slowly drains, but only refills a little. Okay for urination, but anything more we make sure to use the master bathroom.
Sunday, get a call from one plumber that they had a cancellation and can come give an estimate that day. Great! He arrives, checks things out, notes that our current tank isn’t up to code because while it does have earthquake straps around the front, it is not braced on the back. Quote is for $3900+ to do it right, but comes with a 7 year parts and labor warranty. He also looked at the toilet and said it needed an auger.
Wife isn’t feeling good so I begin to heat up pots of water so she can take a bath. Get about three fills from the two pots in, then as I am working on the fourth, I realize the door to the bath room is open. Peek in and out younger son has stripped off his clothes and jumped in himself. The water is pretty hot, but not scalding, though his back was very red when he sat up. He needed a bath anyway, so went ahead and then started the process over so my wife could get one.
Meanwhile, my other kid tries to take things into the bathroom that we don’t want him to take. I am pushing the door so he can’t close it while my wife goes around the other side, but the strain of his pushing made him soil himself. So now I have to take the pots of water and use them to clean him up.
Finally got enough water for my wife to soak, like two hours later than planned.
That night, our dryer, which had been working fine, starts, but then stops after just a few seconds with an error code indicating something is wrong with the temperature sensor. Try a few things I see online, but nothing works.
Monday, kids are up a little after 2 AM. So I am exhausted. Meet the other plumber at the appointed time, who says pretty much the same things as the first one, though his quote comes out to $3400+. But only 1 year labor warranty. Decide to go with the more expensive one simply for peace of mind. Also go buy an auger, try it out, but it doesn’t seem to reach the trouble spot, so no change on that score. Also start looking into the dryer issue, and conclude it is either the thermistor or the control board, but I’ll need to take it apart to find out.
Get to today. Kids wake up a little after 3. Exhausted again. Plumber comes at appointed time, gets the job done in three hours, one hour faster than estimated. While he is working, I try the auger again and get a diaper wipe out (younger kiddo is still in diapers. For those who may not know, both my kids are disabled). The toilet is still clogged, but a few minutes later when I figure I will try plunging it again, I flush so that it will fill with water for me to use and it just flushes normally!
Skip to later and I am trying to use a multimeter to gauge which issue the dryer has, but I cannot get a reading on the thermistor from the control panel end, so I have to almost fully disassemble the thing to get to the thermistor directly, at which point the multimeter lets me know it is fine, so the issue should be the control board. Put the dryer back together and order a new board, paying an extra $30 for next day delivery, but it is so late in the day it will probably be Thursday before it gets here.
So, two of four issues (still have the sink to mess with) done, with a third almost resolved.
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Holy monkeys, man.
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Update: dryer control board arrived today and I got it installed. Dryer is working. 5* review for the repairman.
On the flip side of things, it was our school district’s field day for the special education program, taking all the classes in the district to a park near our house. My younger kiddo will ride the bus to school, but refuses to ride home, and since the outing was relatively early, we kept him home with the plan to drive him over to the park when the schools were there. There would be me, my wife, her brother, and our DSP, in addition to the para-educator assigned to him by the school.
So, we drive over, but one area for parking is closed, only allowing buses in as that’s where all the schools are bringing the kids in. There is street parking, but it is a bit far from the field, and our kiddo doesn’t always want to go where we want him to. So we drive around to the other side, much closer to the field, but the lot is full. Our DSP is following in her own car, so best I can do is let my wife and her brother out to take the kid, and then circle back to where we were.
Takes a bit, because there’s a lot of traffic on the street and a bus in front of the line which can’t just pull out without a good opening. Finally get out, go back and find a spot on the street and head to the park. Pass our DSP coming in, tell her to find a spot and I will see her at the park.
Find our kids’ designated school area and our older kiddo is sitting waiting for me. I start to walk around with him a bit along with a couple of teachers and look for my wife and other kid, but we aren’t seeing them, though someone had seen them earlier. DSP arrives when I get a phone call that they’re at the play area, a short jog from the field, and that the kid is not being safe and to come get him. Leave our older kid to run and find my wife laying on the ground keeping our kid from running off. She had obviously been bit and scratched and was in pain. I go to take over for her but he gets up and runs further away over to where there are some swings, where for his safety, as he was near another kid swinging, I have to do what my wife had been doing and just hold him on the ground.
Unfortunately I had missed the part of the phone call where I was asked to go get the car. I blame the commotion of hundreds of kids and teachers around. In any case, my wife takes over again and I run off to get the car, drive to the other side again and just pull up on the curb where it is low for wheelchair and stroller access. Run back to where I left them, and together we manage to get him to the car with only a few scratches our way and take him home.
I came back to go around with my other kid, but he was done at that point and just wanted to go home too, so we left.
My wife is a mess of bites, scratches, and bruises on her arms, and probably some on her legs. She is definitely going to be sore for a bit. 
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Went to Brixton to eat these. They were amazing.
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You, sir, are superhuman. I’m sure it doesn’t feel that way day to day, but holy crap you are a pinnacle of human endurance and I am in awe of you. Well done and I hope things get easier for you.
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